eatthefrostingfirst

Youngest turned 14 yesterday which is an alarm signal for me to realize that camp is ending in 2 1/2 weeks. For those who have never experienced the "re- entry" let me tell you how it often goes. As you drive into camp- do not think for a nanosecond that your son/daughter will be excited to see you.  (Unless they are 9 and even then mine ran from me. True story. RAN FROM ME. His counselor had to wrangle him up to even say hello to me) Those tears you see? The kids holding onto each other for dear life?  Don't panic. No one has been seriously injured- that is just your child not wanting to leave their summer family. The girls will be openly sobbing and hyperventilating while the boys will just be wiping away tears with their sweaty t-shirts. Campers and counselors will be walking around arm and arm, pretending that you are not there to take them home. You will be doing the lifting of the duffle bags while your said camper is saying goodbye. This may take 10 min...

As we approach August 7th I am always brought back in time. A time when I was pregnant with two baby boys . Two babies who kicked in utero for 28 weeks. And one baby survived. My baby is now turning 16 and I do not take a day of his existence for granted. Okay. I mean, I do get annoyed with him at times but he's a teenager so; par for the course. But truly, this kid is my miracle. I always knew how fragile he was after birth. I didn't need an MD after my name to realize his life was going to be a tough one in the beginning. The tubes and wires kind of gave that away. What I didn't realize What I didn't know Until much later Is that my son almost died. He was a sick baby. A very sick baby. The NICU mantra is "one step forward, two steps back" and we lived that dance move for a very long time. He was constantly faced with obstacles such as collapsed lungs and being unable to make it off a ventilator (which challenged us to living 19 months ...

Summer time is one of my favorite times. I love the beach, sunshine, ice cream and not worrying about if my kids did their homework. We all are just more chill in general. I've been feeling crappy the past few weeks (nothing major) but enough to put a wrench into the time I'm supposed to be enjoying. And I was thinking back to 2 summers ago when I was also having summer ripped from me (but obviously in a way more serious way) And then I started to reflect. Which I do. OFTEN. I was talking to a friend the other day and we were both saying how life after cancer is way harder than life during cancer. And I've written about this before but I just do not think people can understand how that can be. So I'm here to try to explain. During cancer we are on this adrenaline called scared shitless. And we just go. Because there is no other choice than to go. We go to our oncologist appointments, for blood work and scans, for radiation, chemo, and surgeries. We are...

I realize that I do a lot of "back in the day" camp posts. It's because I see camp through the eyes of my youngest child now and well, "back in the day" things were different. Not necessarily better; just different. So when I see that some of the top DJ's are doing their thing at camp this summer I cannot help to think back to the day... Circa 1980 and fuses were being blown in the bunks because of the over use of hair dryers and curling irons. We were teasing our perms to make them fuller and higher and loves baby soft was being spritzed through the bunks. It was Saturday night and it was time for the social. We put on our best outfits and headed down the road anticipating the transformation of the old rec hall. The social always had a theme ("Reunited" by Peaches and Herb," Best of Times" by Styx, "Always and Forever" by whoever sang Always and Forever) Girls lined up against the walls of the old Rec Hall (and by w...

Visiting day circa 1977. My first year at overnight camp. I wore my matching aqua izod shirt and shorts. I hated that outfit with a passion and wore it only once the entire 8 weeks. Visiting day. Because my Mom made me pack that god forsaken outfit and knew she would want me to be wearing it. She also made me take tennis as an optional (now called elective. Why the change? Is elective a better choice of word than optional?) I swore that I would never make my kid take an "elective" that he didn't want to take. (Tennis is now part of a bunk daily schedule. I'm all for kids learning tennis. He will not, however, be the next Roger Federer ) We waited in our bunks like herds of cattle anticipating the blowing of the whistle. Hundreds of children then ran down a paved road, screaming, looking for their parents. I remember being so excited to see my my mom and dad that the tears flowed instantly. I loved camp but I was 9 and the whole running down the road thin...

We all have good intentions. Okay. Maybe not us all. Because we know there are some really big donkey's behind peeps out there. But let's; for the sake of argument, go with "we all have good intentions" We hope to be kind. To pay it forward. To let the person waiting to make a left turn go in front of us. To not notify the Stop and Shop police when the woman with 13 items goes in the express line. We are hoping we are raising good little humans. Please and thank you. Holding the door open. Flush when you poop. Be inclusive. I believe we whole heartedly mean it when we say we are not sweating the small stuff. But some only mean it in the moment. For the day. Or maybe a week. I dont blame you. Our lives move on after those fleeing moments and we get caught up in our day to day drama. Because there are only oh so many times you can take it after removing your kids underpants out of his inside out pants while doing HIS laundry. (Hypothetically s...

I caught some sort of nasty stomach thing this week. I will spare you details but once my scan ruled out appendicitis my dr thought it was probably noro virus (yes I’m the one person in America who gets noro in the summer months ) So in spite of my instant weight loss plan (which as we know never lasts long) the week has sucked on many levels. This is my week to be volunteering at a camp I’ve been involved with the past two years. It’s an amazing non profit (Camp Casco)which provides a week of free summer camp to pediatric cancer patients. It’s a cause close to my heart for the obvious reasons. As each day has passed my FOMO grew but clearly the kids come first and as I was only slowly getting better the red flag went up- putting kids health at risk was clearly not something we were willing to take. As I lied in bed feeling sad for myself I received an email. I had known the time was coming but it’s never easy to hear. A friend from town had died from cancer. He is a man in hi...