I had a bit of extra energy riding into the hospital.
I'm not sure if it was because the sun was out.
Or because I had the windows down blaring the Eagles "Heartache Tonight".
Or maybe it was because I knew this was my last ride in for radiation.
I didn't mind the XXL teal gown today or the sight of the radiation machine. I handed them my card and recited my name and date of birth with excitement. Although I still have 6 more months of Herceptin and surgery in my future, I know another chapter is closing. I'm getting closer to the finish line.
I hopped onto the table and assumed position with my arm above my head holding onto the peg behind me. I scooted up and over as I tried to get lined up with the beams and I stared in anticipation of the radiation beam light turning on....and then off.
I was done.
12 chemo treatments and 35 radiation treatments were in the book.
My red, raw, burning skin was starting to peel and become less painful.
My hair is slowly starting to come back (I'm a step above Sinead O'Connor at this point)
My fatigue is still high but I decided working at camp was too much on my mental and physical being so I left this past week with mixed emotions.
I know it was the right move in the long run.
My brows and lashes are back.
I'm starting to see a light....
As I hopped off the radiation table and got dressed one of the techs handed me my certificate. My certificate of completion.
We recognize the "completion of the prescribed radiation treatments while maintaining high spirits, cooperation and courage". Signed by my 5 radiation technicians. If I was sensitive and emotional before cancer, it's safe to say I'm an emotional mess after cancer. I cried while I thanked them for seeing me through the last 7 weeks.
I got dressed and smiled as I put the key with the bungee cord into the locker marked 4A (my locker of choice) for the last time.
I walked towards the bell.
The one that signifies the end of treatment.
I took a deep breath.
And rang the bell.
Once.
Twice.
Three times.
And I heard applause.
Claps and cheers from all over the radiation office.
The nurses.
The technicians.
The administrative staff.
The patients in the waiting area.
I walked out in tears as they yelled "congratulations".
I cried my way to the parking lot.
I cried while stuck in traffic on the way home.
They were finally...
finally
tears of joy.
I have a ways to go still
but yes,
I'm starting to see the light
I'm not sure if it was because the sun was out.
Or because I had the windows down blaring the Eagles "Heartache Tonight".
Or maybe it was because I knew this was my last ride in for radiation.
I didn't mind the XXL teal gown today or the sight of the radiation machine. I handed them my card and recited my name and date of birth with excitement. Although I still have 6 more months of Herceptin and surgery in my future, I know another chapter is closing. I'm getting closer to the finish line.
I hopped onto the table and assumed position with my arm above my head holding onto the peg behind me. I scooted up and over as I tried to get lined up with the beams and I stared in anticipation of the radiation beam light turning on....and then off.
I was done.
12 chemo treatments and 35 radiation treatments were in the book.
My red, raw, burning skin was starting to peel and become less painful.
My hair is slowly starting to come back (I'm a step above Sinead O'Connor at this point)
My fatigue is still high but I decided working at camp was too much on my mental and physical being so I left this past week with mixed emotions.
I know it was the right move in the long run.
My brows and lashes are back.
I'm starting to see a light....
As I hopped off the radiation table and got dressed one of the techs handed me my certificate. My certificate of completion.
We recognize the "completion of the prescribed radiation treatments while maintaining high spirits, cooperation and courage". Signed by my 5 radiation technicians. If I was sensitive and emotional before cancer, it's safe to say I'm an emotional mess after cancer. I cried while I thanked them for seeing me through the last 7 weeks.
I got dressed and smiled as I put the key with the bungee cord into the locker marked 4A (my locker of choice) for the last time.
I walked towards the bell.
The one that signifies the end of treatment.
I took a deep breath.
And rang the bell.
Once.
Twice.
Three times.
And I heard applause.
Claps and cheers from all over the radiation office.
The nurses.
The technicians.
The administrative staff.
The patients in the waiting area.
I walked out in tears as they yelled "congratulations".
I cried my way to the parking lot.
I cried while stuck in traffic on the way home.
They were finally...
finally
tears of joy.
I have a ways to go still
but yes,
I'm starting to see the light
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