Be Kind

I flew east to west to meet two of my besties for a girls weekend getaway . (Flying next to an anxious woman who hadn’t been on a plane in 20 years - you can imagine how joyous that was)

We have been friends since we were 9 and wanted to celebrate turning 50 this year (for those who aren’t quick in math that’s 41 years of friendship which is truly amazing).

(For the rest of you with your jaws wide open that you cannot believe I am 50- I know- it’s truly astonishing )

We met at camp
Grew up together at camp
And have remained friends in spite of living in three different states that start with the letter M. (As an FYI Montana, Maryland, Mississippi, Maine and Michigan are not amongst the three if you would like to do a mental challenge of where we are from!)

We shopped and laughed and met a lot of LYFT drivers and critiqued our bitmoji’s and ate dinner from a cheese wheel and sang camp songs and consistently said the weather was perfect as was everything about our 3 days together.

We met at camp.
(I said that.)
It was a Jewish camp.
(I didn’t say that)
A place we felt a sense of belonging.
Togetherness.
Family.

Not unlike a temple.
Not unlike the temple in Pittsburgh.

As I was flying east to west the news of the shooting overtook my Twitter and Facebook feed.

Shortly thereafter rows ahead of me had their TVs on CNN.
The death toll had risen by the time I landed.

As a Jewish woman (who admit-tingly, is not very religious)
I have been touched by this shooting (sadly this shooting is comparable to so many other shootings in the last 20 years) yet this one seemed different to me.

This one effected me on a different level.

I guess because I grew up in, what seemed to be, a safe and welcoming suburb of Boston. There were many Jews in my school.
I was never an outcast.

I am raising my children in a similar safe welcoming suburb.
There are less Jews in our town but never (ever )have I felt any kind of hatred- difference- unacceptance spewed at me or my children. (As a matter of fact many of my non Jewish friends commented on the beauty of youngest’s recent bar mitzvah)

And yet I think- I wonder if the people of Squirrel Hill felt like me.

No hatred in their safe community.

They were safe.

They were spending a Saturday morning amongst a group of like minded others where they were feeling accepted and had sense of belonging.

No different than my summer camp.
My child’s summer camp.
My community.

Don’t think it can happen where you are?
Our world is NOT that place anymore.

We are ALL Pittsburgh
And Vegas
And Orlando
And Sandy Hook
And Parkland
(And sadly could go on)

I am anxious quite a bit...
Cancer returning
Will my kids stay healthy
Will I land safely from this flight that I’m currently on
(Will they give me another biscotti cookie?)

But this anxiety- is on another level.
This felt so personal.

As I’ve aged I’ve mentioned my tolerance level for small shit has gone down but my need for respect, kindness and most of all- acceptance- that has gone way up.

I hope I’m passing this on to my children.

I hope you’re doing the same.

I leave you with really simple words..

Be Kind