NUT JOB

I often think I'm a bit of a nut job.
(quiet in the peanut gallery. just read quietly)

So here's the thing
For 15 years I've slept with a body pillow.
Which, as you may imagine, is a pillow the length of your body.
Poor DH as for sure it is like having a third person in bed with us (without the you know)
I blame oldest as it started when I was pregnant and haven't been able to give it up.

(Don't gross out. I have replaced the said pillow a couple of times already).
The thing though is not convenient and when I flip sides, I bring the pillow with me.

I know.
Ridiculous.
You should see me when I travel. I must get extra pillows to replace body pillow.

And yes, I need white noise to sleep.
And I check the alarm to make sure it's on before I go to sleep (not the clock alarm. The burglar alarm)
Because I am terrified of home invasions.
And then I check the alarm twice just to make sure I didn't lose my mind or that the creaking noise I heard wasn't an intruder who somehow snuck into the house between the time DH turned the alarm on and me checking it.  TWICE.

If kids are sick I sneak into their room to make sure they're breathing.
If they cough I cannot sleep. I will lie awake convinced they will need a neb treatment.
This I also blame the children on.
They are both asthmatic.
Truth oldest can't help himself the poor kid as after all he needed a machine to help him breathe for 2 years so the fact that he coughs and I can't sleep should really give me a pass as being a nut job.  I earned that right to be crazed when he is sick.

I can't leave a dirty glass in the sink.
I can't leave garbage in the garbage can other than the one in the kitchen.
Bathroom garbage cans with garbage in them make me a bit crazy.

I warned you.
Nut job.
I am totally an anal crazy woman.

Please promise me you're laughing along with me and not at me.

Anyone else feel the need to list kids you know from camp from A- Z when you cannot sleep and thank goodness for the friends you know who have last names with V and Z so you can get through the list.

I throw out yogurt the second it expires yet I will take a muscle relaxer prescribed to me 2 1/2 years ago when sporting my tendonitis pain. 
(And I may have 3 bottles of narcotics left over from 20 surgeries sitting in my bathroom )
(Or I may not if you're a drug seeking person)

I cannot stand a dirty car.
I cannot have magnets on my car.
It even drives me batty that DH sports a PSU alum license plate holder thingamabob.

All that and I consider myself semi low maintenance.

No for real.

It takes me only 15 minutes to get ready.
I could care less if I wear yoga pants and a tunic every day of my life.
I'm pretty easy to travel with and eat at most any kind of restaurant (minus indian.) (There's something about curry)

So I admit I'm a total nut job but thank god my family know it by now and really don't think twice when I'm refolding the towel that DH folded the "wrong way"

Thanks Dear Husband for putting up with me.

I blame the cancer drugs.
Because I like to blame everything I can on cancer.

Have a good week my village.
It's been a crappy one in the world out there-
stay strong and remain kind.