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Showing posts from March, 2019

No Ghosts!

Todays headlines: How should the NFL punish Robert Kraft? Donald Trump Jr. for President? He Doesn't Want to 'Rule Out' Running for Office: 'I Definitely Enjoy the Fight' Tired man throws bothersome dog in dumpster. As I navigate being (almost ) 51 and the mother to teenage boys (who seem to be doing teenage years better than their mother) I am trying to adopt new philosophies. Because news headlines can be darn right depressing. Spin the negative into a positive. Stop agonizing over things I cannot control. Sounds so wonderful on paper and should be easy to endure. Not so much. Because I was born into a family of worriers- passed on from my Grandmother I am told (and can only imagine passed on from her Mother) It's what we do. And we are excellent at it. And as I agonize over my bathroom remodel taking (way) longer than expected and my weight loss not coming off instantly (in spite of my exercising way more than I ever have. Seriously. E...

THIS IS US

Cried the entire first two minutes of THIS IS US. Seriously. The FIRST two minutes.  I cried through other parts too but the first two minutes did me in.  For those who aren't caught up. Spoiler alert. Kate started singing "You are my sunshine" to her baby in the NICU.  The baby who was born at 28 weeks and who is 2.5 lbs.  The baby who is living in a isolette with a tube down it's throat to breathe, attached to a ventilator. Rewind to my entire first 6 months of oldest's life. (Except I was puking in a bucket after my c-section. TMI? Sorry.) Right down to singing you are my sunshine.  It was my go to song to oldest. But it was the second verse that always did me in The other night, dear  As I lay sleeping  I dreamed I held you in my arms  When I awoke, dear  I was mistaken ... I would sing it to him and cry because verse two was clearly about Zachary. His twin. My first born.  The baby th...

This is not a FRIYAY

Friday was not Friyay. It started with an hour at the vet (she's fine. Just a check up) She is a love but a nudge and she takes after her mother (and father) that patience is not her strong suit. I then had to wait from 1-5 for the Sears repair man who wasnt even coming to repair anything. We got a warrantee with our fridge last year and this was just a check up. Yup. Check ups all around today. The fridge The dog. We dont discriminate in our family. So we all can guess what time Sears man actually showed? Yup. 4:55. I forgot to mention it was 60 degrees today and  I was hankering for a nice walk. (Do people still hanker?) Sears man didn't do much. Ice maker. Check Water thing. Check. Texted manager to make sure he was doing it right. Texted manager when I told him this was a FREE visit as it wasn't coming up as FREE on his little copmputery phone thingie. I'm dieting. A few other things (minor) contributed to my hangri-ness but it wasn't pre...

No judgement zone

I joined a gym. (hold the applause) (I've done it before) I don't stick with anything. Really. Not much. (DH is lucky I havent kicked him to the curb) I get tired of the paint color on my walls art work that I once thought I loved shower curtains and bathroom towels cars that I own and especially.. diets and a gym. (I will, however, never tire of black leggings) It's why I'm CONSTANTLY complaining that I need to lose weight. I hop on a bandwagon, eager to commit, and if I dont get instantaneous results I'm outta there. I admit it. I need help. I'm a quitter. (Or to be kinder- because my new word is compassion)  I just like change. I joined BURN BOOT CAMP and not to sound like a walking advertisement but I'm kind of loving it. Okay, not really love because I will never be the person who puts love and exercise in the same sentence but I'm enjoying it. It is the push I think I've found that I needed. And this is why N...

helping out a cancer friend

I started calling myself cancer girl when I got cancer - because calling myself cancer girl before cancer would’ve just been kind of weird and morbid. Now that I’m a NED (no evidence of disease) cancer girl I often get asked from people how they can help their newly diagnosed friend, family member, neighbor ,etc I may have done a similar post in the past but since it comes up (sadly way too often ) here I go again (on my own..)(What? No one else was ready to jam out to Whitesnake?) Don’t worry about saying the wrong thing. You may actually say the wrong thing (at the time) but it’s only because you’re coming from a good place. And we get that. Even as a “survivor” I often ask people going thru cancer “how are you” which really is the most ridiculous question because clearly the answer is “I have cancer so I’m pretty shitty” I’ve tried to be cognizant of that one turning it to “how are you feeling TODAY? “ But please don’t feel you need to prepare your words. Wanna know what’s worse? No...

You do you

So a friend posted an article from a local paper regarding her daughter, who happens to be transgender. It wasn't solely about her daughter but a few other children who came out as being a trans-child. (Forgive me as I tread lightly on the correct terminology) The point is a Mom replied to her son after he revealed that he was a boy "Alright. I dont totally get it but you be you, and I'll be here" Right? Are you not crying? (Ok. I realize not everyone cries as easily as I do. At least, I hope you are touched) You do you. AMEN Mom! This has nothing to do with being trans. Be gay Be straight Be vegan Breastfeed or don't Work or stay at home Get an MBA or following your passion right out of highschool. Play ball or never pick up a ball I dont give a crap. And either should you. I found this amazing meme the other day that said something to the gist of allow your kid to be quirky, smart, artsy, athletic yada yada yada just don't let hi...

Woot

To my fellow drivers on 93 north this morning- thank you for making my hour and 15 minute commute into my oncology appointment enjoyable. Special shout out to the guy driving with the German Shepard on his lap and the foot of snow on the roof of his car, to the gentleman picking food out of his mustache, to the 30 drivers texting but mostly to the poor couple next to me the entire ride...I imagine the husband was cursing out the wife (or perhaps vice verse) as they could have been surpassing me by miles if they didn’t miss the HOV exit. Knowing I certainly would be late for my 6 month follow up- (and how if I’m not 10 minutes early - in my mind- I’m late) I dutifully call ahead. We have an amazing hospital in Boston and am forever grateful to my medical team but to get through to an actual human at the cancer center is almost comical. 7 minutes and 22 seconds later a woman who clearly hates her job finally answered. I tell her I’m stuck in traffic and just want the office t...