eatthefrostingfirst

Five years ago, August 7th, I brought two beautiful boys into the world; 3 months prematurely. My oldest son and first born, Zachary Jonathan, came out not uttering a sound. He survived 7 short hours. His twin, oldest, came out shrieking and fought for his life for several long months. After almost 180 days in two NICU's, Jared came home with more apparatus than I knew what to do with. He had a tracheostomy, attached to a ventilator and oxygen,a saturation monitor so I could make sure he was breathing okay, a feeding tube in his stomach and my linen closet in the bathroom turned into a medical supply closet instead. It was filled with latex gloves, trach tubes, gauze's, more tubes for oxygen and feedings, and finally, an emergency notebook if I ever needed it. Not the entrance to motherhood I had dreamed about. Nonetheless, we survived. Dear Husband and I faced each hurdle head on because frankly, we had no other choice. I always say if I had time to breathe, I would have been...

I feel like an over-emotional mother today. My baby is three and I've cried on more than one occasion. I remember three years ago as if it was yesterday. Oldest was in the hospital with pneumonia and after 4 days, I was driving him home. That morning I felt like my water was breaking so before I went to get oldest, I ran to the OB who assured me I was fine. I knew better..driving home from Children's Hospital, stuck in traffic on the VFW Parkway, I called Dear Husband from my cell. Calmly I said, "I think my water broke". So, here I have a newly discharged 2 year old diagnosed with pneumonia and needing nebulizer treatments and oxygen all night long. Clearly, my parents were not up for this task. If Dear Husband stayed home, he would miss the birth of his second son. I got home and called the OB on call who obviously said I must come in to labor and delivery to get checked out. I was 35 weeks along and they would not stop labor if needed. We immediately called our s...

It never ceases to amaze me. I go food shopping weekly. Well, honestly, I go more than that but the big shop is weekly. Sundays to be exact. I pull into Star Market or Stop and Shop or wherever I choose this week and grab a cart. I start into the produce and then, it happens. I get the faulty cart. The cart that either has a squeaky wheel or worse..the cart that doesn't work and you look like a fool pushing it because it's so heavy and doesn't turn correctly. Yesterday I got that latter. I was too lazy to change it for another because my luck, I would get the squeaky wheel one this time. I had already loaded up with veggies and fruit and just didn't want to load it all up again. Half way through my shop I was cursing my decision. I was pushing it through the aisles, bumping into people who thought I had too much caffeine or something simply because I couldn't steer the thing. I muddle through, choose a line and am waiting to unload the groceries. Naturally what hap...

I cried this morning watching the Today show. To be honest, it doesn't take much to make me cry but for the past 3 days I have been glued to the TV watching people memorialize Tim Russert. This morning, was Luke's turn, his son. Watching this newly college graduate talk about his Dad with such composure was just...well, tearful. He said that there wasn't a day that went by that he didn't know his Dad loved him. Frankly, that's how life should be. I have always been Daddy's little girl. From the moment I can remember. I joke that he would buy me the moon if he could. He is just that kind of Dad. Thoughtful, loyal, dedicated...and loves his family. My Dad isn't a particularly emotional man and isn't one to tell me daily that he loves me but..I know he does. He is there for me. Always. I married someone similar to my Dad. My loving husband is not very communicative in the mushy gushy kind of way. He isn't smothering me with kisses and declerations of l...