Skip to main content

Cursing cancer

I've been cursing cancer this week.
Clearly who am I kidding as I curse cancer almost daily; but particularly this week.

Hearing about way too many people getting diagnosed with this god forsaken crappy disease.
It saddens and angers me in so many ways.

Selfishly, I'm cursing it this week because I'm suffering from Dequervains tendonitis which is just a fancy royal sounding name for crappy tendons that hurt like hell near your thumb. I couldn't take the pain anymore and went to get a cortisone shot. All the while I was blaming it on candy crush but good news peeps- I can continue climbing the levels of the mind sucking game AND get to blame the damn sore thumb and wrist on ..
you guessed it..
 Cancer!
No, it's NOT cancer but the joint pain is from the Exemesthane that I'm on to prevent the cancer from coming back.
Joint pain for another 1680 days.

Awesomeness.

A friends mom has breast cancer. Her second time.
Another friend just diagnosed.
A friend's sister just had a double mastectomy. Age 35.
And just read a blog post about  a young girl  who died last year, at age 19, from a rare form of breast cancer.

And that was just this week.
Along with the Florida shooting sometimes life just seems really cruel and unfair.

I'm really trying to move my life along.
I'm trying to curse less at the mirror (trying being the operative word).
My days are not spent wallowing so much anymore yet my nights are still filled with insomnia and way too much overthinking. (Can you blame me? See above about the last week)

My breasts are still uneven and my port is still in.
Scars are less raw; yet still extremely pronounced.
I'm so good at complaining these days so why should I move my life along?
Really. I got this thing down pat.

However it's vacation week and sunshine and warmth is in my near future.
Dont you worry.
I may be all zen but you can be sure I'll be complaining of how I look in  a bathing suit.
Some things will never change.







Comments