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Dear NYC

Dear NYC

I do not love you.
As a matter of fact when I see your little I heart NY shirts, I cringe.
I realize I may be a minority.

I am sorry but your city makes my blood pressure rise the minute I cross the bridge.
It's very noisy.
There's so much honking and people cross the street when it's a green light and don't seem to care.
And the drivers don't seem to care that you are crossing the street illegally.
And the taxi drivers certainly do not care.

Stop.
Go.
Honk.
Curse.
Repeat.

Sure the city is lively.
You drop a crystal ball on New  Years Eve.
You have lady liberty, a really large M and M store and naked cowboys with signs over there privates hanging out in Times Square.
Seriously, what's not to love?

There is a restaurant every 3 stores so you are never out of choices.
However your diet coke cost me $2.95 and $75 to park in a garage for less than 3 hours.

No one slows down.

When I waited in Penn Station for our train to announce the track I felt like I was out of a scene of a Curious George Book.

Remember the one where he gets in trouble by messing up all the track numbers?

People were staring there ready to pounce the minute their track was called.
Youngest ran the second he saw it-elbowing through others because he was so fearful we wouldn't get a seat together

We did get a seat together.
One of those 4 seats with the table in the middle.
I can't ride backwards because I will get car sick.
I asked others who were already on the train which way it was facing so I could choose seat accordingly.

I was grunted at twice and ignored once.

I chose the wrong seat and asked oldest to switch with me.
Except when I switched I realized that oldest was seated next to a very smelly man.
I switched back.
I'm sure smelly man didn't notice.
I rode backwards for two hours until I couldn't take it anymore and proceeded to get sick in the amtrak bathroom.
Upside-
the bathrooms are fairly clean.
Downside- man still smelled and I  had 90 minutes to go.

We were happy to be on the train as we sailed by the highway filled with non moving cars.
Lord knows neither me or the teens wanted to recreate our slaphappy ready to scream 6 hour ride from previous day.
Plus we were tired.
Phsycially. Mentally. Drained.

Cute little Annabelle and her sister next to me distracted me from smelly man  as they argued over which video they would watch but my stomach and I just were counting down the minutes til we were home.

Back in the suburbs.
Where I needed to drive to the market (seriously city people- I curse having to bring my bags in from the garage how DO you do it?)
How are you not poor from your continual $20 burgers?
Don't you want your dogs pooping on a lawn?
And aren't you tired of elevators to get you to the outside world?

Sorry city peeps.
I will not be sporting the I heart NY shirt but I do love me some Dylan's candy bar.

Love,
Suburban Mom

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