Parenting is by far the hardest job I've ever had.
It drains me...stress, love, exhaustion, joy, fear, worries
Last night, after a bad few weeks, I took a walk with a dear friend. We both discussed how good it felt to walk off our frustrations yet realized how little it takes to stress us out these days. We often yell and have short fuses over little things. Why? Because we are day in and day out with our children and forget what it's like to talk with an adult. We forget what it is like to discuss things other than chicken nuggets, bowel movements and sharing toys.
So today, at my oldest's IEP meeting (Individualized Education Plan. Children who have special needs are often on IEP's to get the services they need in school), I tried to look at the big picture. I tried to realize that my child is not the only child with issues and lets focus on the whole shebang as opposed to disecting him.
The big picture is that my son is doing quite well in school. He is "up to par" (my favorite school-esque expression)and is doing "better then fine" in Math. (This makes me chuckle as I flunked statistics twice and still get hives at the thought of fractions and decimal points) However, no shocker.
My oldest is black and white.
Concrete.
Doesn't see gray.
I was told that he needed to focus more, pay attention and work on his social skills. Kid is quite shy. Has a hard time making friends due to this (and delay in speech doesn't help much) I was also told he thinks five steps ahead.
As I'm listening to the therapists and teachers talk I'm thinking about my oldest child.
I'm thinking how the other day he amazed me by throwing out some random fact.
How he has acquired some good solid skills with chewing
How he is starting to be defiant.
So is this okay with you? I was asked.
Huh?
Yes. I was distracted.
I was thinking of other things at the same time I was listening to my son's therapist talk about his handwriting.
I was thinking about my father in the hospital, the dry cleaning I needed to pick up and the trip to Whole Foods I needed to make all before I pick up youngest at 1130AM.
Point being.
I'm the big picture kind of person.
I multi task well but I also think of 100 things at once.
I'm neurotic and anal
I function well in life.
I'm sure my oldest will be fine in life yet my heart breaks that he has these struggles.
I'm a mother.
Who worries.
Like I said, this parenting gig is rough stuff
It drains me...stress, love, exhaustion, joy, fear, worries
Last night, after a bad few weeks, I took a walk with a dear friend. We both discussed how good it felt to walk off our frustrations yet realized how little it takes to stress us out these days. We often yell and have short fuses over little things. Why? Because we are day in and day out with our children and forget what it's like to talk with an adult. We forget what it is like to discuss things other than chicken nuggets, bowel movements and sharing toys.
So today, at my oldest's IEP meeting (Individualized Education Plan. Children who have special needs are often on IEP's to get the services they need in school), I tried to look at the big picture. I tried to realize that my child is not the only child with issues and lets focus on the whole shebang as opposed to disecting him.
The big picture is that my son is doing quite well in school. He is "up to par" (my favorite school-esque expression)and is doing "better then fine" in Math. (This makes me chuckle as I flunked statistics twice and still get hives at the thought of fractions and decimal points) However, no shocker.
My oldest is black and white.
Concrete.
Doesn't see gray.
I was told that he needed to focus more, pay attention and work on his social skills. Kid is quite shy. Has a hard time making friends due to this (and delay in speech doesn't help much) I was also told he thinks five steps ahead.
As I'm listening to the therapists and teachers talk I'm thinking about my oldest child.
I'm thinking how the other day he amazed me by throwing out some random fact.
How he has acquired some good solid skills with chewing
How he is starting to be defiant.
So is this okay with you? I was asked.
Huh?
Yes. I was distracted.
I was thinking of other things at the same time I was listening to my son's therapist talk about his handwriting.
I was thinking about my father in the hospital, the dry cleaning I needed to pick up and the trip to Whole Foods I needed to make all before I pick up youngest at 1130AM.
Point being.
I'm the big picture kind of person.
I multi task well but I also think of 100 things at once.
I'm neurotic and anal
I function well in life.
I'm sure my oldest will be fine in life yet my heart breaks that he has these struggles.
I'm a mother.
Who worries.
Like I said, this parenting gig is rough stuff
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